Get me out of the ball game

Joe, noting with happiness the beginning of Spring Training, asks for help from:

Anyone with knowledge of a New York Yankess Theme Song ringtone that will work on a T-Mobile Nokia 6010

I'm mentioning it here only because I really like the guy. We have a lot in common (we're both former New Yawkers), root for the same pro football team, and share similar political views.

I knew this time would eventually come, though. You see . . .

. . . I hate the Yankees. HATE!

I wasn't always this way. Long ago and far away, I really didn't care one way or the other about them. They were just there, every single year, on the radio. Not my family's, but the one belonging to Mary's (she was a few years older) older brothers.

Then came the New York Metropolitans, The Mets, a team so bad I loved 'em. How bad were they? Even with my vision problems and complete lack of athletic ability, I could have been a starter. The Yankees kept winning (except in 1969 when "The Amazin's" actually, incredibly, and unbelievably won their first World Series) but, I was okay with that. It didn't bother me. I just didn't watch WPIX, the New York television station that carried their games.

In 1974, however, I made the mistake of marrying a New York Yankees FAN-atic. My only excuse -- the only one I have -- is that I was young. I didn't know what it meant to be married to one.

When baseball season starts, for him the world as we know it ends. It's Yankees, all the time. Every game. Every single frickin' second.. All of them. The house could be on fire, but fleeing the flames would have to wait until the inning's over.

Then there's the playoffs with the Yankees in it every year, which every year is followed by the World Series, with the Yankees in that, too.

Bad enough? It got worse. How?

In 1979, I birthed an Atlanta Braves FAN-atic.

When baseball season starts, for him the world as we know it ends. It's Braves, all the time. Every game. Every single frickin' second. All of them. The house could be on fire, but fleeing the flames would have to wait until the inning's over.

As a result, it's not only the Yankees I HATE although they do retain a special place in my heart because they were first.

I've grown to despise baseball.

Every single frickin' second of it.