I'm a "Traditionalist"!

At least that’s what the woman on the phone called me, and I’m proud to admit that it’s true.

You see, I’m not into this early voting thing that seems to be the newest rage. Election Day is the first Tuesday in November. That’s when you’re supposed to go to the polls to vote, and I do.

This absentee ballot thing is also bugging me. There’s a valid reason for it if you’re going to be away from home on Election Day. If, however, you’re only voting absentee because you don’t want to be inconvenienced by having to go alllllllll the way to your polling place, maybe you really don’t need to vote.

Polls. I’m sick of polls. SICK.SICK.SICK of them. Every day you get the results from several, and none of them agree. In fact, they don’t even agree with the results from their last poll which might have been reported only 24 hours before.

Da Kid, his eyes glazed, asked me the other day why the polls are so screwed up. Which one to believe. I told him not to pay attention to any of them, don’t worry about them, and that they’re all nonsense.

None of us in this house has been called during this election by a polling group. Or, perhaps some tried but got the answering machine, instead, because we stopped answering the phone about three months ago. Why? Too many recorded, political messages. And it’s only gotten worse.

I did pick up on a call today when the phone rang simply because I was expecting someone to call at about that time. It wasn’t that person, but it was still an actual human.

Caller: Hello, My name is _________ _________ and I’m calling from ___________ _________. Do you have a few minutes so I could ask you a few questions?

My gawd, someone calling from a polling group! I felt like a rock star or something. Ask me which candidates I’m voting for and why! Ask me how I’m voting on the constitutional amendments on the local ballot and the reasons behind my decisions! I’m ready! I even have my sample ballot ready for tomorrow . . .

Me: Yes.

Caller: Are you a registered voter?

Me: Yes.

. . . and the next thing I know she’s going to ask me is whether or not I know where my polling place is so that way she can put me in the "Likely Voter" column . . .

Caller: Have you voted yet?

Huh?

Me: No, tomorrow’s Election Day!

Caller: Oh, so you’re a traditionalist! And I bet you know where your polling place is, too.

Me: Of course!

Caller: Have a good day tomorrow and thank you for your time and for voting.

And she was gone.

Ya know, I almost feel cheated.